Focus

Have you ever told your children to pay attention? I know I have. But I'm not really sure they even know what it means. Sometimes, I'll tell them to look at me when I am talking to them because if I don't, they'll be looking at the television or the dog or the window or the wall or whatever else is nearby. I bet when they do look at me, they're not really looking at me. You know, they do that thing where they stare at your nose and still don't pay attention to a word you say. And then I talk and all they hear is "blah blah blah" like I'm an adult in a Charlie Brown cartoon. These days, it seems every child in the world has some form of ADD or ADHD. Listen, I'm not belittling anyone or taking away from those kids who have legitimate issues. But, it's just too easy these days for people to blame that disorder and give their kids pills and do nothing else. I may be wrong, but my thought is that these diagnoses are made because a child will focus intently on one thing like television or video games, but then not be able to focus at all on other things like their parents, homework or chores. Seriously? This is a disorder? No. This is childhood. Who can blame these kids? If you let your child play their handheld video game in the car, at the dinner table and in bed, are you just expecting them to say "Oh, thank you mother, but I would much rather sit quietly at my desk and review multiplication tables." Come on! Wake up! Everywhere you go these days, kids are thumbing something - texting their friends on their $400 phones or playing games on their PSPs. How can you, as a parent, allow that to happen while you and your husband chat over fried cheese at TGIFridays? Why are not talking to your kids? Oh, wait, because you don't want to? And then you say they have ADHD? Engage them in conversation for crying out loud! Listen, I know my kids lack focus. I say they get it from their father. He could focus on ESPN even if there was a tornado, alien attack and Victoria's Secret runway show in the same room. But, dollars to donuts, he will walk past the same dirty sock on the floor 500 times and not see it. It's not a disorder. It's almost like tunnel vision or having blinders on. People see what they want to see. My kids would rather jump on the steps and sing Demi Lovato songs instead of paying attention and putting on their shoes. They would rather stare at their beauty marks in the mirror than brush their teeth. I'm sure as they get older, they will doodle instead of pay attention in class. I'm not going to label that behavior and give them medication, that's for sure. I just think that focus is.... oh, wait, something good just came on television.....