Give or take

Are you a giver or a taker? You can think you're a giver because it really sounds like the better option of the two. But do you give? You must know the giving mom. She's the one that always hosts playdates. She's the one that makes sure everone is happy and taken care of. She's the one that will pick up your child after school and bring him to her house so that you can spend an extra hour at work or the gym or squeeze in a dentist appointment. And she's usually happy about giving, never complaining, always doing more. She's the one with the third-row seat that is always being used. She's the one that gives the snack to the little league team every week and buys extra crayons for the class just in case a student doesn't have a good color. And then you know the taker. The one who never invites you over unless it's for a makeup or bag or jewelry party or whatever. The one who will let her kid over to your house to play but never seems to return the invitation. She's hitting the gym while you're serving goldfish crackers to four kids and cleaning up the mess. I'm not saying there's anything wrong with taking sometimes. Maybe I'm wrong, but I don't think putting yourself first is the best answer. I think your kids will see that and learn that it's okay to put themselves before others. Why should I be the class mom if I know Sue will do it and do a great job? Why should I volunteer at the science fair if I know Laurie has done it for the past five years and it's always run smoothly? Why should I....? I think I get frustrated sometimes. I see myself doing a lot and other people doing nothing and I get aggravated. Then again, I don't have to do what I do, right? Just because I like to give, it doesn't necessarily mean the lady down the street feels the same way. Maybe she wants to be focused more on cleaning her house or working out or having alone time or going out to dinner. All of those things are fine, so why would I begrudge anyone that? I guess I should just continue to do what's right for me and not expect anyone else to do the same. But, as I keep on giving, I will weed out those around me who only seem to take, take and keep taking.