Just a moment

Can you think back to a pivotal moment in a relationship you've had? Can you think of one thing that someone did or said to you that sticks in your head and will probably stay there forever? That's how it is with kids. Things stick with them - a lot more than we think they do. If my daughter can remember what her 2nd birthday cake looked like, I'm pretty sure she remembers something I said to her last week - well, unless it was "put your laundry in the hamper" or something like that. I don't even need to close my eyes to think back and remember some of the things my parents said to me. I can hear the words. In some of those cases, it was a really nice thing - in a couple, it was something that kind of hurt. Of course, my parents would never intentionally hurt my feelings. It was, most likely, just something that comes out in normal conversation. To adults, the things we say are just little nothings. They are meaningless to us. To kids, they might mean the world. So that one little second that slips by. The words that are said innocently - they might be the words that stick in your child's head. They might be the words that shape how she sees herself. they might be the words that come to her mind when she is deciding what to say to her child. So, the next time you say something and see your child pause at your words, think about what it was that you said and how they might feel about it. You may realize that it's not just a moment and it means more than nothing.