Memories

Looking at all of these Facebook posts with all the fun places people take their toddlers and cute traditions they have make me miss my kids when they were little. It also got me to thinking about the memories I have of their childhood and the things my kids actually remember.

I took my kids to Disney World when they were about 6 and 2.5. And they remember nothing. The youngest swears she had never been there, but I tell her I have pictures to prove it. I am not a Disney fan (hold back the gasps). I think it's cool and magical, but just too crowded and expensive for me. So, when I travelled there recently and tried to give my kids that experience since they couldn't remember it the first time, I wondered why I even bothered the first time around. Was it for them or for me? Since they couldn't remember any of it, was it just a waste? It was fun to see their eyes light up at the sight of Cinderella and wonder how great it must be to live in her beautiful castle. But when they were older, the magic was definitely gone. As I was walking through the happiest place on earth, I saw so many screaming, tired toddlers and so many stressed out parents trying to keep their kids happy (and quiet) while waiting on line for 40 minutes.

I'm not knocking Disney. This seems the case for all of these cool things we do for our kids when they are little. Sesame Street Live, the county fair, apple (or pumpkin or Christmas tree) picking, the zoo, the train show at the botanical gardens, the polar express. All of these fun things that we enjoy while we are doing them, but then can't remember 10 years later. Have I failed as a parent because I didn't make them enjoyable enough for them to remain a part of their memory?

Why is it that my youngest can't remember her first time meeting Mickey Mouse, but she can remember the color of the shirt she was wearing when someone took her crayon off the desk in her kindergarten class?

I think we are so lucky in these modern times to have the technology to document our children's lives at every turn. I have done my best to keep photos and videos and even have journals for both girls so they can look back and see how much I kept track of as they grew up. I kept art projects and ticket stubs and stuffed animals (okay, so maybe I have hoarding tendencies) just so they will know that those things were once very important to them.

When I see something beautiful and show it to my children, their first instinct is to take a picture of it and I balk. I tell them to just enjoy the moment. Enjoy the sunset. Enjoy watching the waves crash on the beach. Enjoy the snowfall. Enjoy the lit Christmas tree. Not everything needs to be photographed and shared on social media. Sometimes it's more beautiful to just look at.

With that logic, I answered my own question. Even if they don't remember the trip, it was worth it. It was worth it at that moment. And that's what I will remember.