Thursday, November 4, 2010

Part of the problem

I've always been one of those people who thinks if you're not part of the solution, you are part of the problem. Do you notice when people just like to vent their drama and never want to hear any answers? They want to know why their life is so screwed up and why their kids don't behave and why their job is so crummy and why they never have enough money and why their husband isn't more attentive and why their neighbors don't mow the lawn. I guess some people just like to complain. They like to keep their lives in this constant state of worry and negativity. I've got to admit, I'm that person sometimes. I guess sometimes I'd rather not fix the problem and just whine about it. But, once you get older and have kids and see all the issues that they have to face, do you wonder why moms can't just figure out that their worries should be more about the future generation and less about gossip and catty behavior? I met a young man this week who runs dance residencies and classes for elementary school children. His mission is to change the world. And he's doing it one kid at a time. He said there is so much intolerance in the world and that people judge each other because of their insecurities. His insight was refreshing. His ambition to help children learn to like themselves and accept and appreciate others was moving. Seriously - can you just stop whatever it is you're doing right now. Is there something or someone that has been bothering you? how do you react to that person/situation? Remember, your children see what you do and hear what you say. You are their model for behavior. if you can't handle a woman you don't really care for without saying nasty things about her to your friends, can you really expect your daughter to treat other girls at school in a different way? We can't keep blaming other people or "society" for the way kids are today. We've got to stop this vicious cycle. We have got to teach civility and manners and discipline. We got to stop this whole idea that no one ever loses and every kid gets a hit and wins a trophy. And, as parents, we've got to stop looking down our noses at other people and their children. No one is perfect - not even close. Let's all stop being part of the problem.

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